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He Carried a Vision of Love Alive in the World

chris head shotSomeone incredibly dear to my heart and soul
left his body on Wednesday.

A spirit buddy. A soul friend.
A guide. A mentor.
A lover of life.

One who sought to “open eyes and entice hearts out of their prison into accepting a simpler, more loving way… I want to hold their hands and say, “don’t worry, we really can be fully ourselves, love makes its own way. Let’s laugh and enjoy one another and be caring, and vulnerable, and alive, and free.” ~ Chris Weaver

Chris held space and invited us into magical places, inside ourselves and out in the world. He modeled ways to live a more loving, compassionate and interconnected world. He was devoted to helping children be as fully alive and whole and connected to loving community as possible. He focused his attention on the places where children gathered. Including his sons.

Chris was a teacher. a father. a husband.
And so much more.

He was a wordsmith…
a poet
a writer
a storyteller
a metaphor maker

He could paint words that evoked worlds.
Co-creating cultures that felt like family.
He was a wisdom weaver with the elements.
It’s been said, that Chris was magic.

He carried a vision of love alive in the world.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I haven’t had a real conversation with Chris in about 13 years.
I don’t know where he was in his life journey.
But I do know that he experienced life deeply.
He was a feeler. He was awake to the joy and the suffering of living.

And when I knew him, he had old, old patterns. Patterns that could pull him into dark and isolating places. Sometimes those places were called depression. He was committed to learning to navigate those patterns.

“sometimes i feel like my dramas are like boats. they go somewhere. if i forget that the ocean is love, & is me, then i’ll stay on the boat (down in the hold, banging my head against the wall). but when i remember that it’s just a boat, then, well…maybe instead of dissolving it back into a wave of undifferentiated love (always a fun option), right now maybe i’ll just stay on the dramaboat & use it, follow it a bit further, find out what it is teaching me, let it shine & surprise somebody…

… and i sure remember my own version of the panic of feeling myself circling back into the prison-boat of my own depression (clang)” ~ Chris Weaver | 10.13.04

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

shofar-temple-mount-rosh-hashana-tallit-prayer-jerusalemYesterday was Rosh Hashanah.
I have not celebrated this religious holiday in many years. I felt called to go to services. The Rabbi spoke of the symbolism of blowing the shofar (a ram’s horn). Its sound is raw and piercing. It sounds pained, like crying. It is also a triumphant sound of joy and celebration.

She told us that it’s meant to remind us to pay attention and be alert to the raw truths happening around us.
To listen to people when they tell their own stories.
To hear the cries of those who are suffering.
To hear the mothers wailing for their lost children, even if their children are your enemy.

In her sermon, she connected this to the need for us to hear the declarations that Black Lives Matter and the accounts of how Palestinian people are suffering. We must listen to their stories in their own words. We must allow ourselves to hear and feel their cries.

After services I went to the river for a ritual (another tradition on this holiday). When I returned home, I learned that Chris had passed. I hear in his death that he was suffering. I feel shock rippling through his community. I return to the stories of the shofar.

Chris gifted us with so many different ways to experience life, love and beauty.
And it feels like perhaps he kept people protected from seeing the depths of pain and suffering that he also felt.

Some of the most amazing and magical people on this planet, who love so deeply and see fiercely how to make this world a more loving and just place, these are also people that are suffering deeply on the inside.

In my grief, I am also praying with all my heart, that we who are living,
…that we will get better at hearing the raw cries of those that are hurting,
…that we will see other options than to isolate ourselves when we are hurting,
…that we will shake up the patterns that have so many people unaware of how difficult life is for others,
…that we will give more loving attention to the realities of living with mental and emotional challenges,
…that we will grow in our abilities, as communities, to love and care for one another.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

To my dear friend, as you transition to greater freedom…

Thank you for the beautiful gifts of living, loving and experiencing life that you have shared with so many of us. Our hearts and lives are forever changed for the better. May the love you cultivated be of profound support in helping those who loved you dearly find solace and peace as we adjust to you no longer being in physical form. May we always feel your presence. Rest peacefully. Fly free, dear one.

 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A few windows into his life:

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May we place our hearts with you…

Awake in the darkness of the night… I’m feeling… my heart traveling the terrain of trauma and love erupting fiercely on this globe, erupting fiercely in the hearts of so many dear souls.

“In Hebrew, “pay attention” is literally translated as, “place your heart”. Placing our hearts requires effort. It requires us to focus beyond the chaotic white noise that fills so much of our lives… Placing our hearts means imagining a world where we see people for who they really are, where we seek to understand the lived experience of those around us, from their perspective. Not with judgement, but with compassion.” ~ Rabbi Will Berkovitz

Under the gaze of this new moon, I feel the grief and warrior-ship of my trans and non-binary community after the loss of Scout Schultz this week and Derricka Banner last week. May we place our hearts with you. May we see you as you are, whole and beautiful. May we love you as you are, courageous truth tellers.

I feel the dark and confusing places that the human mind can travel to, those moments when purpose and peace and connection feel stripped away, when we are struggling with our mental and emotional and physical health. May we place our hearts with those of you who are in this struggle. May love seep into the cracks, overshadowing the pain, and illuminating the light of your own precious soul, igniting the places where you can feel the divine breathing through you, where you can feel lightness and see how incredibly valuable your presence here on this earth is.

?I feel the fear and trauma as storm meets earthquake meets fire meets flood. As people?’s lives are uprooted, loved ones lost, homes demolished. May we place our hearts with you. May we continue to turn to one another and extend a helping hand. May we build home together. May we see beyond our differences and awaken to our abilities to help make this world safer for one another… in times of crisis and also in the ordinary moments.

I feel the weight of exhaustion, the personal toll taxed upon those who daily are impacted by forces of oppression — systems that are trying to hold you down, trying to keep you from fully expressing the profound aliveness of who you really are, dampening the opportunities for your genius and gifts to be contributed to this world. May we place our hearts with you and tell the truth about these systems of destruction. May the fierceness of our gaze cause these systems to incinerate. May the power of our imagination and our commitment to one another grow brilliant webs of relations grounded in love, justice and equality. May we all know freedom and liberation. May we cultivate a more loving and compassionate world for our children to grow up in.

Thank you for traveling with me into these feelings and prayers. Thank you for being willing to sit with the dark and the light. Thank you for placing your heart and gifting your attention. Thank you for dreaming into the power of our togetherness… May it be so. <3

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To My LGBQTIA Family…

Keep shining. Wear those capes, live your dreams, and let’s together grow a better world. Please and thank you!

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Aisha Fukushima

“They try to divide us by color, but it won’t work. No. No. No.
They try to take us from each other and it won’t work.
We intertwined.

I believe in miracles.
I believe in a greater world.
I believe in good things.
And it starts with me.

I keep it humble cause I’m always on the real, yo.

I was born free and free I will be.
Your oppression is insanity.
My impression is humanity.”

Some quotes from Aisha Fukushima. Her and her music are inspiring me deeply. Good medicine.

And here she is singing for George Clinton.

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Loving Parents Empowering Powerful Transgender Children

We humans are so powerful when we get to be whole… to be who we are. ?

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Indigenous Peoples – Keepers of the Library of How to Be Here on This Mother Earth

A very powerful account of the significance of what has already happened in this Indigenous peoples led movement, history that has been made. So much has been accomplished. So much to learn from this moment… and to apply to the other areas where resistance and courage in the name of peace and Life is needed. How prayer and nonviolent direct action and profound stepping in to support and stand up for one another and for the life of Mother Earth, how together we can create change and impact. And how the struggle is no where near over… we are just beginning in this long process of waking up from the deep slumber we as a collective peoples have been in… and we are so fortunate that there are Indigenous leaders showing us ways forward. Keep your eyes open… the leaders are alive now and showing the way. They are living amongst the people.

From Pat McCabe on Facebook:

I can’t help but notice… For the first time in the history of the planet that I am aware of, there was an international outcry, first, on behalf of the rights of indigenous peoples, who are the keepers of the library of how to be here on this Mother Earth, and who need their place on earth with its accompanying water, food, mountains, animals, etc., in order to keep being who they are, and to keep making their relationship, with this critical knowledge. Second, the international outcry rose to meet the tactics of the extraction industry with truth, outrage, grief, protest, donations and finally, with prayer. For the first time in ?the history of the United States, a.k.a. Turtle Island, all of the indigenous peoples banded together bringing their deepest ceremonies, on behalf of their neighbors, and on behalf of Water, and on behalf of Life for ALL. Then, indigenous communities from around the world, also came to support this prayer. Then, peoples from all nations worldwide came to join this prayer. Then, as if that? weren’t enough, ?entities such as the entire city of Los Angeles, as an official entity, sent their official seal of support, not only on behalf of the Standing Rock Sioux Nation, but in support of all of the activities that were opposing the petroleum pipeline, and for the protection of water, far outside of their immediate concern. Then, 500+ multi-faith clergy showed up, for the first time ever, at the request of an Indigenous, spiritual, and government leader, Chairman Archembault, to put themselves on the line, their physical being endangered on behalf of Indigenous Peoples rights, yes, but also on behalf of Water and Life, and yes, against the extraction industry, and corporate and government interests. AND, as if that were not history making enough, these clergy from all different faiths, were trained in non-violence action, made ready for other actions, conceivably. AND, THEN, they participated in a ceremony in which they BURNED THE DOCTRINE OF DISCOVERY, renouncing it, as sacred law, renouncing it as “God’s will” and saying outright it was WRONG. (For those of you unclear on what this doctrine is, in a nutshell, it came from the Vatican, the Pope, in which it was decreed as a kind of divine law that any peoples on any part of the Earth that were “discovered” and who were not “of the one true faith” were humanus animalus I think was the term, meaning they were a form of animal, and therefore had no soul, and therefore could not possess, own, land and who could rightly, with divine blessing, be taken into perpetual servitude, aka, slavery. The Pope has been approached probably every year for the last 50 years by indigenous peoples worldwide, asking for the Vatican to rescind this doctrine, and acknowledge its error and falsehood. So, far, has not happened, although the current Pope did meet with Indigenous peoples this spring, and promised to continue the conversation. What may not be known, is that many governments worldwide, including the US government have based their relationships with indigenous peoples and their rights on this doctrine. But I digress…) After the 500+ clergy from the full-spectrum of faiths, turned their back on their institutional rhetoric on behalf of Indigenous peoples’ rights, Water, and Life, U.S. VETERANS showed up! They showed up, saying that they were sworn to protect and uphold the safety, the Constitution, and U.S. citizens, against enemies foreign and domestic. This means they were calling the petroleum Corporations as well as North Dakota law-enforcement, as well as a sleeping U.S. Government, “domestic enemies” that needed to be stopped. How freaking huge is that?!?! Under death threats, and deep scrutiny by their peers, in an unprecedented, shall I say again, historic act, they came to protect Indigenous peoples- what?!?!- as well as the thousands of “non-indigenous” peoples fighting this petroleum corporation that is all but government sanctioned. They could have stopped there and still they would have stunned the world, but no, they took it a HUGE step further, they surprised the Lakota, Dakota, Nakota Sioux nations by getting down on one knee, and attempted to name all the harms committed by U.S. Armed forces on the original peoples of this part of the Earth, even including the destruction of their languages, the stealing of their children, and more. And… they asked for forgiveness… I don’t think there is another place on the Earth where this has happened. EVER. They also called upon the treaties to be acknowledged and upheld by the U.S. Military- as well as the U.S. Government. AND THEN… when law enforcement from eight states would not allow the Dakota people to attend to their ancestors’ disturbed burial sites, repelling the people in full-riot gear, with gallon-canisters of pepper spray and rubber bullets, one morning, hundreds of women made their way to the frontline, and this militia, parted, allowing the Women’s Nation to approach the water to pray. The sheriffs, police, military, national guard, hired guns, etc., FULLY ACKNOWLEDGED THE AUTHORITY OF THE LIFE-BRINGER LIFE-BEARER. And all of this doesn’t even address the fact that native youth in South Dakota and North Dakota had devastating suicide rates, the reasons systemic, and now they can know that their people and their ways were instrumental in showing the entire world that there is no such thing as “inevitable.” It was their people that woke a sleeping giant. No one will ever forget who the Lakota, Nakota, Dakota nations are ever again. This changes everything, for not only other Indigenous peoples, worldwide, but for humanity at large. For humanity at large because, what has taken place could not have been possible without all races stepping out of their comfort zone, creating an unprecedented interracial collaboration, and human solidarity that withstood gale force storms of every nature.
Once again it has been proven, and in our time, at this critical moment, that nonviolence is the way that creates, deep, lasting, widespread, inclusive, change on this Holy Mother Earth. In the lineage of Gandhi, and the Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr., these events will also be noted. These events are the proof, and guidance, that we needed in order to understand how to move forward in the face of overwhelming odds of brute force and economic and political power. Oh, and it is definitely worthy of mention, that after the brutal attacks that took place on the front lines, 700 people, native and non-native (it is hard to explain how huge even this interracial unifying is in the part of the world known as North Dakota) walked from Mandan to the municipal legal complex, encircled it by joining hands, and let law enforcement know that they forgave them. I don’t know about you, but that’s not something I witness very often.

So have a little patience friends, we’re moving as fast as we can… And quite honestly, from where I sit, it looks to be downright miraculously fast??

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Give Love

Give your love away. Don’t be afraid.
Love is life
Love is priceless and it guides us
Lifts us up and ignites us
Love unites us
Open up your heart and let it shine the brightest
Give Love. Give Your Love Away.

MC Yogi – Give Love (Giving4Living Mix) from MC Yogi on Vimeo.

Thank you for this delicious offering.

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