friend ship
my friend paul has boarded his ship and sailed away and back to southafrica. he was part of my family for over a year and now leaves behind a vacuum, an empty space, which is stubbornly present in our lives.
friendship – what a funny word.
why is this bond connecting people called friendship? what on earth has a ship got to do with everything? we have a saying in german: „we’re sitting in the same boat“ when people share a similar (mostly negative) experience. maybe it’s the same in english, i don’t know.
it is preferable to sit in a ship with someone you like. or maybe you start to like someone just because you are in that same bloody ship together. dependence can do stranger things to you. the smaller the boat, the more crucial friends become..
whatever. paul’s back in capetown.
and i miss him.
I sit here with the all too familiar feeling of reverance that leaves me incapable of finding language. Jan, this post ellicits so much raw and genuine emotion within me. Recognition, understanding, celebration, appreciation, gratitude, and a welling sense of love. I find myself resting upon that still, parting water, feeling the color of the setting sun upon my body. I am filled with reverance.
. . . and I can’t help but notice a pattern, the frequency of reading words of yours, often inquiries into ordinary matters of life, and then feeling engulfed in a deep and sweet sense of reverance. What a gift that is. Thank you.
And a tangential gift that I carry with me into the night is the invitation to make friends with those stubbornly present empty spaces in our lives. It feels to me like this writing of yours is a beautiful example of deepening intimacy with What Is — inquiring into it while accepting it and letting it be.
Thank you.
With love,